loneliness

The Loneliness of Lying

“It will live the lifestyle you need to project to others. You can finally be who you want people to think you are. They don’t know you’re sitting at home, getting caught up on ‘Downton Abbey’,” reads an article in which I found out about a new app called CouchCachet which “finds all the coolest places in your neighborhood, then automatically uses Foursquare to check you into them — with none of the irritation of actually leaving the couch.”

Yes, the idea is to lie so that people will think you’re cooler than you are (if cool is indeed defined by being out at the place of the moment,

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Are you a fish living in water?

Have you ever seen someone in the grocery store who looked like he was looking for conversation more than looking for food to buy? Or have you been that girl who thought you’d wander the mall in hopes of striking a spark of human connection… just because you were lonely? I’m not talking about romantic pursuits; I’m talking about basic person-to-person engagement, something that used to be unavoidable and is now something that we cannot take for granted.

People used to sit on porches and talk to those who came by.

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Fire and Rain

“I’ve seen fire and I’ve seen rain.  I’ve seen sunny days that I thought would never end.  I’ve seen lonely times when I could not find a friend….”

My SPACIOUS partner Joey and I have had some good conversations about fire, reflecting on what it means to be on fire and to need to be on fire because there are icebergs to melt (a favorite quote of mine from abolitionist William Lloyd Garrison). Fire is an apt metaphor for me for energy,

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The Flight Back to Conversation

If a smile is the first currency exchanged in a potential relationship, think about where actual words might take you. And then think about what is robbing you of the joy of conversation.

I last wrote about missed connections and people who were seeking to find strangers they wished they’d spoken to when they spotted them in public. Most of them simply exchanged a smile, and yet the smile had stayed in the memory of one party, who was now desperately seeking the other.

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I was wrong… nuancing the “for and against” issue

My last post was about how one way to avoid “us and them” thinking is to be FOR things and not AGAINST things. I made the point that when someone espouses a cause they care about, many people take the time and energy to knock down that same cause, and I don’t like that approach (personally or for SPACIOUS).

One reader, Sarah, replied to my blogpost via Facebook, saying, “…I do think there’s a difference between constructive criticism, which opens up the possiblity for growth,

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Life is Good (Enough)

I once read that singer Carly Simon took a polaroid photo every day and kept them in a special album. As I remember it, she did so to spur herself to record specific things for which she was grateful. I like the idea of doing something each day to jolt myself into more gratitude. I tried Carly’s gratitude photo idea one year and made it eleven days. I found that file recently and couldn’t remember exactly what about my vacuum cleaner made me so happy on one of the days,

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